Zack's Anger Diary: The Line Is the Line



Dear Diary …


Do you know what a line looks like? Now I don’t have a whole lot of faith in people, but I am pretty confident that if I asked you to draw a straight line on a piece of paper, you could do it. Look at you! Who’s the big winner?


OK … so now you have a straight line. So … if I ask you as humans to line up in a straight line, I’d like to think you’d be able to do that as well …. Except … you can’t!


Hey … dodos! If you go somewhere … like …. say … the farmers market and there’s a bunch of people standing in a line waiting for it to open. You don’t just stand there at the entrance to try to sneak your way in!


“Oh! I didn’t realize there was a line!”


What exactly do you think the rest of us are doing over here … organized sunbathing? Waiting for an invisible bus to arrive?


Self checkout at the grocery store is another great example where these shady ignoramuses try to skeet themselves in.


“Oh … were you in line?”


Noooo!! Just loitering. Love loitering.


I get it … you don’t wanna wait in this line. I don’t wanna wait in this line either, but I do. Because that’s what normal humans who contribute to society do.


Moving on Diary … I hate the playground.


And it’s not that I hate the playground ALL the time … sometimes its a great way to toss a couple kids out there and keep ‘em occupied for a while. The problem is when it’s the LURE of the playground as an add-on. So like when I have to drag my butt to a boring ol’ PTA meeting at the school … sit there … listen to talkin’ … vote on stuff … and then all you wanna do afterward is get home because you’ve working all day, and still need to make dinner, and still have laundry, and gotta make lunches for the next day, and the toilets are dirty, and … “Can we stay and play on the playground for a while?”


No … I’m sorry … Mommy and Daddy have a lot of …


“PLEEEEEEASSE??? Everybody else is staying!!”


Yup … don’t mind us. We’ll just sit here … while you have joy. And then we’ll FINALLY get home and immediately be asked, “When’s dinner? I’m hungry!”


Ahhh yes … our little blessings.


Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye