Zack's Anger Diary: Drinkin' the Kool Aid



Dear Diary …


Now … I applaud these companies for their amazing successes. They make money hand over fist. They nail their product and their customers love them. Bravo to you!


That said … I just can’t figure out how we all got talked into drinkin’ the Kool-Aid that Starbucks and Chick Fil-A have served to us. They have each basically said, “Let’s take a product other people are doing … do it basically as good as they do … but let’s charge more for it and have people sit in giant lines all the time when they buy it.” Ta-dah … massive success!!


How do they do it? How do they get us to buy into that concept?


Oh … I remember now … the children.


Get the children to love us, then the parents are powerless to go anywhere else. It’s brilliant really, because the children get caught up in all the goofy bells and whistles they hear about.


Diary … I had to take my kids to Starbucks over the weekend and my daughter HAD to order a drink that she saw on Pinterest. So I had to order … wait for it …


“A grande iced coffee with light ice, heavy cream, five pumps vanilla, three pumps caramel, whipped cream and then a caramel drizzle.”


And to answer your question … yes … I felt as stupid saying it as it sounded when you just heard it.


I didn’t think it was possible to confuse the person at Starbucks with an order … but I knew I had pulled it off when I heard … the long pause.


I mean it only took two more back and forths to finally figure it out … and I don’t blame her one bit … this one was all my fault.


But hey … two drinks and some banana bread later and we spent $13 and one of us is laughin’ all the way to the bank on about 12 cents of actual supplies.


I mean … props to you Chick Fil-A … the last time I had to stop on a road trip and get lunch for the family I think we spent 50 bucks … and I don’t recall seeing a filet mignon anywhere in that bag. Them vandalizin’ billboard-writin’ cows be sittin’ at home with their filet mignons still in their body and countin’ all their money.


I mean … it’s all good … but why is it always “wait in a giant drive-thru line” good?


I tell you right now … if the ‘Rona becomes the thing that turns this world into the Zombie Apocalypse, I have no doubt that even though all of humanity has been wiped out except for a handful of survivors, the line at the Chick Fil-A drive thru will still be massive.


I could never figure that out on “Walking Dead.” They’re always going around trying to find other survivors … just go to the nearest Chick Fil-A at lunch time … they’re all right there.


Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye




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