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Anger Diary #537: The Great Data Mystery

April 23, 2019

 

Dear Diary …

 

I realize when I start telling you about this issue, you’re gonna laugh at me for being lame … so let’s just get it out of the way right off the top … I don’t have unlimited data on my phone.

 

Yeah yeah yeah … Ha ha ha … I suck.  And that may be true, but I refuse the pay the ridiculously high price they wanna charge me for unlimited data.  Especially when I know the cell phone companies pay about a nickel for data and then upcharge it out the wazoo to all of us.

 

And furthermore … I bet a lot of you who just laughed at me have unlimited data … that Mom or Dad actually pay for and not you.  Ahhh yeah … caught ya … didn’t I?

 

Anyway … I’m slummin’ it over here with 4 gigs a month.  Which you know what, is plenty for me.  My wife on the other hand?

“I don’t know why it’s using so much data.  I’m not doing ANYTHING!”

 

Ahhh yes … the world famous excuse of wives and children everywhere … “I didn’t do ANYTHING!”

 

Let me be clear … ladies … I love ya … and as a whole you are WAY smarter than us stupid men.  But I can tell you this … when I guy does nothing … NOTHING happens.  Toilets don’t break, stuff doesn’t get spilled, and data charges don’t go flying thru the roof.  Those all feel like SOMETHING to me … don’t they?

 

Anyway … one moth we go over on our data plan … and I go into the account so I can see the details … cuz I wanna know why.  That way the next time “I didn’t do anything” happens, we can know what things to avoid.

 

So when I go in there, I see that one day in particular has a CRAZY amount of data being used.   Like 50% of the data for the whole month on just this one day.  And since I'm not getting any explanation from my house,  I call cuz I wanna know what caused such a big spike so it never happens in the future.

 

“Well sir … we don’t know what used it.”

 

What do you mean you don’t know?

 

“We just know it gets used, but not how it gets used.”

 

I’m sorry, what?  You’re the people keeping track of it!!!

 

If you don’t know what used it, then how do you know it got used in the first place?  I’m just supposed to trust you?  How do I know you don’t just pull a number out of the sky and toss it on there?

 

I’m sorry, but if you’re gonna charge for something … you gotta be able to keep track of what you’re charging for!

 

If I was your employee and you paid me hourly, it’s not like I could sit here and say ….. Yeah … uhhh … I worked like a thousand hours this week.  I know you didn’t actually SEE me do any of the work, but TRUST ME … I did it.

 

I don’t think it’s too much to ask that you know what you’re actually charging for, do you?

 

Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye

 

 

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