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Zack's Anger Diary: No More Sleep Excuses

May 29, 2018

 

Dear Diary …
 
This is it.  I am over it.
 
This has been used as an excuse for far too long, and it’s time for it to stop.
 
You are grown ups.  It’s time to take responsibility for your life and stop using “I overslept” as an excuse.
 
Now let me be clear.  Sometimes it DOES happen, and can be a total accident, but oversleeping should only happen to a normal person about one time a year.  I'm not talking about that. I’m talking to all of you that use the “overslept” excuse about once or twice a week.  
 
And there’s various varieties of you offenders.  
 
First, it’s the “I sleep through all of my alarms” people.
 
The story here is always the same.  It’s some person that sets 27 different alarms that go off every three minutes, and yet somehow they still manage to turn each and every one of them off and go back to sleep.
 
And to me … the solution is simple.  Just wake up.  That’s it.  No other tip or trick.  Alarm goes off … get up.
 
“But I’m just so tired and my body wants to go back to sleep.”
 
I’m sorry … that doesn’t work for me.  It’s time to put your big boy and big girl pants on and get up anyway.
 
Cuz guess what?  I wake up at 3:30 every morning, and it suuuuuuuucks.  But I do it, because that’s the time I WAKE UP whether I like it or not.
 
“Do you ever get used to it?”  NOPE!  But I do it anyway.
 
Look … I know you don’t WANNA get up.  Nobody does.  Too bad!  Not an excuse.
 
Another offending group of people are the “I turn my phone off at night” people.
 
This one is less for oversleeping and more the person who conveniently is  never available when you’re in a situation and you need them.  You call them 600 times, text them another 600 times, and you never hear back until conveniently three hours later they say … “Oh sorry, my phone was off.”
 
No.  You don’t get to do that anymore.  You’re a grown up and with a grown up job and grown up responsibilities.  Trust me, I don’t wanna call any of my coworkers at 5am, but sometimes there’s a problem and I NEED to.
 
“But I’m sleeping!”
 
Oh well!!
 
When’s the last time life always went exactly the way you wanted it to?
 
Hey … in a perfect world none of us would ever have an alarm and we’d all live at the beach and be independently wealthy and the whole universe would get along.  But this ain’t a perfect world.
 
Plain and simple … wake up.  No more of your sleep excuses.   They’re done.
 
TIll next time Diary … I say … Goodbye.

 

 

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