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Zack's Anger Diary: Stop With All the Pictures

August 22, 2017

 

Dear Diary …

 

First of all … I think it’s great that we now all have access to a really good camera pretty much whenever we want it since it’s on our phone.  Think of all the great pictures you missed back in the day, simply because you didn’t have a camera.

 

Not to mention all the times you did have a camera, took a picture … had to   fill the entire roll of film … took it down to that dorky little Photomat store … waited around … then got home only to discover that Grandma’s eyes were closed during the picture and the whole thing is ruined.

 

Now you can take 247 pictures of the same pose, pick the best one, and Grandma is preserved and looking like her wonderful Old Lady self for eternity.  Shoot, you can even throw a couple Instagram filters on Grandma and make her look even better than real life!

 

Not only that … but you get VIDEO in the palm of your hands, too!  No more big dorky video cameras that make it look like you work for CNN and are you're running around trying to film “breaking news.”  Now it’s point … shoot … done.

 

That said … must we film EVERYTHING????  Let’s be honest with ourselves here … 95% of all the things I see people take video of is boring and there is no way they will ever watch it again.

 

I think of this every time I go to one of my kids’ school functions.  I mean … sure … take a couple pictures … maybe a little video … but I see all these parents who film EVERYTHING.  And I mean EVERYTHING … they film performances that their kids aren’t even in.  Who the heck is going to watch that later? 

 

“Hey … anybody wanna watch a bunch of third graders we don’t know dance around on a stage?  Oh … and a bonus … the audio quality is really bad and it’s from really far away?”

 

Ooooh … ooooh … ME!!!!!

 

Look … just because you have the storage on your phone, doesn’t mean you have to use it.

 

Also … don’t be wasting time taking pictures and videos of things when there are super easy ways to access way better versions of what you are doing.

 

Take the eclipse for example … what in the world do any of us need to take a picture of the eclipse for?  

 

“Ooooh … look at me … I’m looking at the eclipse!”

 

Yes … of course you are … just like everybody else.  Not to mention those other people with better cameras and filters that did it for … oh I don’t know … NASA.  I think I'll go with their pictures.

 

Why the heck am I going to risk ruining the lense on my phone to take a crappy picture of the eclipse when THE PEOPLE WHO SEND HUMANS INTO SPACE do the same thing?  They have telescopes that can look at Uranus … I don’t think your silly Droid phone can compete with that.

 

And here’s another thing … just because you took a picture, you are not legally obligated to post that picture on social media.  It should still look … oh I don’t know … good … in order to post it.

 

I see so many awful food pictures on social media.  It’s one thing if you have a beautiful plate of food, and you use awesome filters, and the thing is just spectacular.

 

But when you have yourself a runny tray of slop served on top of some sad rice and it looks like lunch from Shawshank Prison … you don’t need to post that.  Even if it was “Yummy Dinner With My Bae!” … It looks like dog food.  Might’ve tasted good (I guess), but it’s gray and depressing and the rest of us don’t wanna see it.

 

Till next time Diary … I say … Goodbye

 

 

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